Category humor/odd

CemeteryVille

After seeing yet another somethingVille billboard along US101, the thought struck me.. Why hasn’t Zynga catered to the goth/vampire/werewolf market? How about CemeteryVille where you come out at night and play your character (whether ghost, goblin, vampire or teenager trying to spark in your convertible after the prom). You can get points for sucking the most blood, spend your hardbought credits to buy garlic or a silver bullet.

Perhaps there’s only so many people this would appeal to, but as someone who’s never played an anythingVille game, I know I’ll enjoy the updates of my friends showing up on the Wall (Mr. Gorbachev tear down this Facebook Wall!)

Extra-Innings

This one’s a little “out there” but fun. It’s been sitting around in a notebook for a while, so I can’t really tell you when I came up with it. The idea is this:

You’ve been sitting for hours watching a baseball game. It’s been a good game, but it’s been tied for a few innings and we’ve gone into extra innings. It’s starting to get cold, they’ve probably stopped selling bear, and you’ve had all the peanuts you can shuck. So what now?

Well, the idea is that when a game goes into extra innings… perhaps just when it’s been a few innings (say they just finished the 10th), it’s now times to force something to happen. Even better, it’s time to get those cold, dedicated fans into the action.

So if a game goes into the 11th inning, and for each inning thereafter, each team has to pick one fan from the stands to come into the game for one of the professionals. This should shake things up, but the game still might go on for a while. Perhaps it’ll end up with all fans on the field?

I guess it might be a disadvantage to the visiting team to have to use one of the fans, even if they try to screen them, as they might be fans for the home team and help throw the game. So perhaps the vaunted “home field advantage” should come at a price. If you can’t win the game using that advantage by the 10th inning, you then get the “home field disadvantage”, this would be where only the home team has to replace a professional with a fan.

Of course that would give the visiting team an advantage, but you’re a hometown fan, if you really believe in your team, you know they can win no matter who they have on the field.

Novelty Hearing Aids

We happened to be visiting “The Shack” today looking for a sort of novelty Xmas present and next door was a hearing aid store. Quickly an idea came to me – why not novelty hearing aids?

On the one end of the spectrum you could have the “hearing voices” model which records random bits of conversation and then when there’s silence later it will play back those conversations in hushed tones. You’ll start to think you’re hearing people who aren’t there.

Related to that would be that “affirmational” model which would periodically fill the quite spots with affirmations such as “you’re super!” an “you deserve another piece of cake.”

Then there would be the “transformational” models such as the auto-tune model which would make even the worst night listening to friends do karaoke tolerable.

What about the “affiliate” models? Big Red Sox fan? The hearing aid has a big logo and when the game is on, it acts like a radio. Periodically it could play greatest team moments as well. How about the voice of Ted Williams to make a guy want to wear a hearing aid?

So, there could be a market for intentionally purchased novelty hearing aids as well as the surprise gag gift. Either way, with a little bit of fun and entertainment, even people with perfectly good hearing will want to wear them.

Been Prepared

How about a book filled with acceptance speeches for all occasions? It could be entitled “Be Prepared” (or something similar) and could give you either the beginning spark for a speech of your own or the whole thing verbatim.

It could include speeches for when you win:

  • President of the United States of America
  • President of some lesser country (of your choice)
  • Nobel Prize (Peace or other one)
  • Smaller Prizes (Elk’s Club, PTA, “Best Dad”)

I did some preliminary research, here’s a text file with some awards I found:
award list

GraviTees

Perhaps a little bit morbid, but why not a line of T-Shirts that point out that life isn’t always perfect and happy? Won’t some people want “heavy” t-shirts just to point out the irony of it all?

Here’s a list of slogan ideas:

  • My doctor just told me I have 3 days to live
  • What does ‘inoperable’ mean?
  • My son placed me in this home and all I got was this tshirt
  • My wife had me committed and all I got was this tshirt
  • Is hair supposed to fall out?
  • Bald is sexy, right?
  • Ssh! No one knows I am contagious!
  • Ebola is a state of mind
  • I am terrorized
  • Someone bombed my car
  • My other car is a bomb
  • It’s not ‘suicide’ if you set off my explosives
  • Autopilot Terrorism
  • I only get one chance, so let me get this right
  • It’s only Ebola
  • Did you get your flu shot? Too bad.
  • I forget, how do you spell Alzheimers?
  • I can’t feel my legs
  • Have you seen my Mommy?
  • Have you seen my baby?